


Hope Here Needs a Humble Hand

by orphan_account



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Baby Tup!, But he's kind of a mess, CT-7567 | Rex Needs a Hug, Cody is a Good Bro, Echo and Fives are adorable, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Gen, Greif is hard, M/M, Mando'a, Rex is a good dad, Rex is doing his best, So are Kix and Jesse, So is loss, Tup is also here, and adorable, domestic AU, gratuitous mando'a, greif, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-09
Updated: 2020-03-10
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:41:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23073382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: “You ever been married?” Rex hissed. “You ever lost your wife, vod?”Kix sighed. “You know I haven’t.”“That’s right. You haven’t. You’ve never had to put the love of your life in the ground. Or go home to three little boys who are looking at you to solve the worlds problems all by yourself when you feel like the whole thing is imploding. And until you have, Kix, any advice you have on the right way to grieve can fuck right off.”OR: Angsty Modern AU with a healthy dose of hurt/comfort and bad coping skills cuz that's my jam.
Relationships: CC-2224 | Cody & CT-7567 | Rex, CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi, CT-21-0408 | Echo & CT-27-5555 | Fives | ARC-5555, CT-21-0408 | Echo & CT-7567 | Rex, CT-27-5555 | Fives | ARC-5555 & CT-7567 | Rex
Comments: 44
Kudos: 212





	1. No Man Is An Island

**Author's Note:**

> In which, we meet our boys and the author proceeds to ruin their day. 
> 
> Title from Black Flies by Ben Howard.
> 
> The almost title was I Want You (Here With Me) based on Here With Me by The Killers. Just in case you're wondering where this is going.

Hospitals, as Rex well knew, were a dichotomy. They could bring unimaginable joy and at times, indescribable pain. 

But he'd never thought, even as he accompanied his wife into the delivery room, that this would be the day he experienced both. 

"You're doing so good, love," Rex said, brushing a kiss across her knuckles where she gripped his hand like a lifeline. "I'm so proud of you."

She snorted, and if she werent so exhausted he was sure she would roll her eyes. 

"Don't try to sweet talk me now, I'm still blaming you for this." She winced and held her breath as a contraction rolled through her. Rex pressed another kiss to her knuckles and squeezed her hand, using the other to smooth her hair back off her sweaty forehead as he waited for it to pass. She had left off screaming and crying a while ago, begging for it to be over a bit after that. She was almost resigned at this point, though Rex didnt dare ask to what.

"Breathe, babe. You'll have a beautiful baby boy in your arms before you know it. Just breathe." He promised her, pressing a kiss to her hair, letting her squeeze his fingers until he thought they might break.

It was because of that tight grip she held that Rex knew, seconds before the doctors, that something was wrong. 

Just as the contraction was ending her head suddenly lolled to the side and her fingers went lax in his hand.

"Babe?" 

In that same moment several of the monitors started going off and the doctors and nurses movement's became frantic.

"Whats-whats happening?" Rex said, glancing around at the frenzied activity.

Instead on answering him Rex found himself bodily moved aside as a nurse dropped his wife's bed to be flat and words he recognized only from TV started filling the room.

_cardiac arrest...hemorrhage...no heart rate...losing infant vitals_

"Hey, hey wait! Whats going on??" Rex resisted gloved hands that tried to pull him away while others mandhandled his unconscious wife into an oxygen mask. 

"Mr.Fett." 

Rex looked up sharply, to see Dr. Eerin gesturing to him near the wall. Reluctantly, he left his wife's side to apprach her. 

"What is going on, Bant?" 

"Just what we cautioned you might happen. But try not to worry. We were ready for this, the OR is ready to go." She reached out to squeeze his arm, "I need to go prep for the surgery. We are going to try and save them both, Mr. Fett."

Sound faded away ad Rex missed the last few things Dr. Eerin said as he turned back to look at the bed feeling oddly disconnected, like he was floating outside his body. His wife, his world. The woman who'd rescued him in more ways than he could count, been his partner in everything for so long he hardly remembered what life was like before he knew her. 

Vibrant, always laughing, she challenged him at every turn. Fives and Exho adored her. And there was nothing she was looking forward to more than meeting their newest son. 

He suddenly was struck with the thought that the pale, fragile creature lying on the gurney that was being pushed out of the room was not his wife at all.

"Mr. Fett? Rex!" 

Sound dropped back in and Rex gasped, turning to Bant and saw they'd somehow come to stand in the hospital corridor. 

"Rex, I asked if anyone is here with you."

He swallowed but, unable to pull a sound from his throat, gave a minute shake of his head. 

"You need to call someone." She said decisively, "I don't know how long this will take, but I need to go. Please, call someone to come be with you." 

She gave his arm one last squeeze and then turned to run down the hall, gripping both ends of her stethoscope in her hands. 

Rex fell back against the wall and sank to the floor, his head in his hands. 

* * *

"I'm king of the mountain!" A little voice shrieked.

"No I am!" Another one countered. 

Cody braced himself for the disaster that would greet him as he rounded the corner from the kitchen, bringing his mug of coffee to his lips to hide his smile. 

Where there used to be a tastefully decorated, very adult living space, compete with souveniers from world travels and half full glasses of wine, there was now a riot of brightky colored plastic toys, fuzzy blankets with cartoon charactwrs on the. In the middle of it all, two rambunctious five year olds wrestling with a bemused and exhausted looking Obi Wan. 

Cody came to a stop behind his couch where Fives was attempting to push his brother to the floor. 

"No I am!"

"I was here first Echo!"

"Boys." Cody chided lightly, watching his husband lever himself off the floor, hair and clothes eskew. Cody had never figured Obi Wan for the physical type, and he probably hadn't been, but he was as helpless to deny Cody's nephews anything as everyone else was. 

"Is it nap time yet?" Obi Wan said, half teasing as he straightened his glasses. 

"No!" Both voices rang out in unison, and, now with a united goal, began tugging Obi Wan toward the basket of toys they kept in the cabinet under the television for when the boys visited. Obviously a rousing game of Cops and Dinosaurs would prove naps were a needless nuisance.

Cody tipped his head in salute to his husband's masterful subtly in subverting an argument that undoubtedly would have ended in tears. His phone vibrated in his pocket and Cody grinned, seeing his brother's name on the screen. 

"Hey, _vod'ika_ , time for that cigar already?"

Silence was the only response and slowly Cody's grin faded. 

"Rex?" 

Obi Wan looked up immediately at the strange tone of Cody's voice. 

"Is that Dad? Tell him - can the new baby share a room with - with Echo instead?" Fives piped up from the floor where the three of them were building a block tower. "Then I can have my room by myself."

"No fair!"

"Yes huh!"

Cody put down his coffee and put a finger in his opposite ear to block out the argument. There were strange choking noises coming from Rex's end of the call. 

_"Cody..."_ Rex sounded _wrecked_. 

"Rex, whats wrong?"

Suddenly the argument silenced and Cody looked up to see three sets of eyes on him. He locked gazes with Obi Wan who announced he was going to turn on _Finding Nemo_. The boys cheered and, relieved they were sufficiently distracted, Cody turned to leave the room. 

"Rex, talk to me."

_"Cody she's...the baby...I dont..."_

Cody didnt even realize his heart was racing until he felt Obi Wan's hand on his elbow and looked up into the concerned blue eyes. 

"I'll be right there. Rex? I'm coming."

There was the sound of fabric rustling and a shuddering breath.

_"Okay."_

Cody hung up, moving toward the front door to pull on his shoes. 

"Whats happening?" Obi Wan asked, following him.

Cody shook his head. "I dont know. He could barely talk he sounded...gods he sounded like he'd been _crying_."

Obi Wan sucked in a sharp breath and nodded. "Go. I'll stay with the boys. Let me know whats going on. Do you want me to call your brothers?"

Cody thought a moment, fiddling with his keys.

"No. Better not to worry them. I'll call them when I find out whats going on."

Obi Wan nodded and pulled Cody in for a quick reassuring kiss before he disappeared out the door. 

* * *

Rex had lost all track of time as he stared, unseeing, out the windor of a small private waiting room on the L&D floor. There was a styrofoam cup of coffee in his hands and a blanket around his shoulders, but he had no memory of how they got there.

 _Shock_ , his mind supplied. _You were in shock._

Maybe he still was. 

The room had a handful of empty chairs, he sat in one facing a window that looked out over a small patch of grass and the parking lot. 

"Rex."

Rex didnt look up, didnt move, but he felt his twin come and sit beside him. He looked over a few minutes after the warmth of an arm settled over his shoulder. 

"What happened, _vod_?"

Cody looked worried. Rex was worrying him, he knew. But he couldnt bring himself to care. 

He turned to look back out the window. 

Cody frowned, realizing his error. He should have tried to find a doctor, try to get some indication of what he was walking into. But Rex had sounded so _shaken_ on the phone and Cody couldn't think of anything that would make his usually reckless and untouchable _vod_ sound that way that didn't make his blood feel like ice in his veins. 

And he'd needed to be at his brother's side. 

"The boys?" Rex's voice sounded hoarse and distant, despite being right next to him. 

"They're with Obi Wan."

Belatedly, Rex nodded.

"Rex, please tell me whats happening. You're scaring me." 

That seemed to get his brothers attention and Rex turned, slowly, his brown eyes clearing as they bore into the mirror image of his brother's face.

"She's gone." 

Cody's mind stuttered. 

"Gone? You mean...taken to a different department? Was she transferred?"

Rex barely moved but Cody saw the flinch.

"No. Gone."

Cody sucked in a breath, all the pieces clicking into place.

"Oh no." He whispered, tightening his arm over Rex's shoulders. "The...the baby?"

"He's okay. Tup." Cracks formed in Rex's voice and his face, reality starting to decend upon him like a cold, heavy blanket. _She's gone. You're alone. You're alone now._ "He's here...but she's not."

Rex's chin started to tremble and Cody pulled his brother to him, tucking his head under his chin. Rex's back heaved, sobbing into Cody's chest and he shut his eyes, tightening his arms. Rex dropped the coffee to the floor, spilling it at their feet and clutched his brother's shirt and jacket. 

"Rex. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, _vod_."

Rex didnt hear him. He couldn't hear anything over the sound of his heart in his ears and the voice repeating over and over _you're all alone now._

_All alone._


	2. winter stole summer's thrill

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Rex is reunited with his boys and Cody is the best bro.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for the kind reviews to the first chapter! I have most of this written already so updates will probably be fast. Please continue to review if you enjoy it, I love hearing your thoughts!!

"Obi Wan!" 

The red head stopped and turned, dragging the twin five year olds he had by each hand to a stop as well. 

" _Ba'vodu_ Jesse!" 

Suddenly Obi Wan was being pulled in the opposite direction, away from the elevator and toward the Hospital front doors. 

"Hey _ad'ika_." Jesse said, scooping Fives up onto his hip when he pulled out of Obi Wan's hold and slammed into his trunk-like legs. 

Obi Wan took in the sweat pants and muscle tee emblazoned with the 'Fett's Gym' logo. 

"You coming from work?" 

Jesse nodded, rubbing a hand over his bald head. "Closed up early when Cody called." 

Obi wan nodded. 

Jesse glanced down to where Echo was hugging his leg, his constant babble unintelligibly muffled and ruffled the small boys' hair.

"Are you here to see our new _vod'ika_ Jesse? His name is Tup!" Fives announced, doing his best to scramble up onto Jesse's broad shoulders.

"I know, Fives." Jesse murmured, shifting the child around to his back. He lowered his voice further, falling into step with Obi Wan as they made their way to the elevator bringing Echo along with a hand on his shoulder. "Have you heard anything new? Do you know what happened?"

Obi Wan shook his head, absently soothing his hand through Echo's hair and blocking his efforts to sneak his thumb into his mouth. 

"There were some complications, that's all I know."

Jesse nodded, turning to watch the lights indicating the floors as they ascended. 

"Uncle Jesse, whats 'complications' mean?"

Jesse bounced Fives slightly on his back.

"Nothing for you to worry about, _ner'ad’ika_."

* * *

Cody stood side by side with Rex, pressing their shoulders together. It was half an effort to remind Rex there was someone there with him, and half in case his brother's legs suddenly gave out. He still wasn't looking too good. 

At the end of the hall the elevator dinged and there was the distinct sound of tiny footsteps barreling toward them. 

"Dad! Uncle Cody!" 

"Is our _vod'ika_ here? Can we see him?"

The brothers turned to watch the spectacle that was the boys' stampede-like approach. Echo's shoelaces were whipping around by his feet while Fives was half out of his jacket. 

Rex peeled away from Cody with large strides to meet them, falling to his knees and enveloping them both to him with a desperation they had no reason to understand. 

Accustomed to this type of greeting, both boys returned his hug, but started squirming when it didn't end after several moments. 

"Da-ad. You're holding too tight."

"I wanna see _vod'ika_ Tup, _buir_."

Behind them Jesse spotted the tears in Rex's eyes that he was trying desperately to hold back. He looked up to where Obi Wan had gone to stand beside Cody, looking as if they wanted to be holding hands but couldn't quite decide whether they should. 

"Alright," Rex said, sounding steadier than he felt, "you wanna meet Tup?"

At their emphatic nods he knelt further to grip both boys around their legs, one in each arm, and grunted under their combined weights as he climbed back to his feet. 

"Let me help, _vod_." Jesse stepped forward but Rex just shook his head. 

"I've got them." They were heavy and too big to carry around anymore but Rex needed to have his sons close right now.

He brought them back over to where he and Cody had been standing in front of the large window that looked into the nursery. Inside stood two rows of medical bassinets with half a dozen sleeping or wriggling newborns. 

"Which one is he?" Fives asked, leaning forward in Rex's arms to press his face and hands to the window. In his other arm Echo had succeeded in slipping his thumb into his mouth, leaning down to rest his head on his _buir's_ shoulder. 

Distantly, Rex realized this was interrupting naptime.

"You see the one in the blanket with the ducks on it?"

"Yeah!" Fives' excitement made Echo lift his head. "He's got a lot of hair!"

Rex nodded silently, a lump he'd only barely worked past tightened up his throat again as he watched his youngest sleep. 

He remembered his wife declaring adamantly that the boy would be born with a full head of hair because of the heartburn she'd been suffering with for the better part of two months. She'd glowered at Rex when he teased that that was a wives tale and threatened him with her celery stick. 

_Of course it is, Rex. I'm a wife. You mark me, this baby will be as hairy as a gorilla._

A smile ghosted across his lips when Tup's face disappeared in a giant yawn, this thick, dark locks sticking out in all directions. 

" _Buir_?" Echo's voice was soft and Rex looked at him, surprised by the serious look on the child's face. "You crying?"

At that, Fives turned back from where he was making faces against the glass at his new baby brother. 

Rex did his best to smile. "No, _ikaad_ , I'm fine."

The little crease between Echo's eyebrows said he didn't believe him. 

"Dad?" Fives small hand came up gently to the side of his face and Rex closed his eyes, feeling the grief bubbling up from deep inside his chest, squeezing the air out of his lungs. His chest ached. "You need hugs?"

Rex's brave smile began to slip and he sniffed. He bobbed his head in a disjointed version of a nod and immediately both boys were encircling him as best they could with their small arms. 

"Its okay, _buir_."

"Yeah. We'll get mommy. Her hugs always make everything better."

Rex made a strangled noise, his heart shredding in his chest. Suddenly the weight of both boys was removed from his arms and Rex slumped against the wall, burying his head in his hands. He would have slid to the floor if a strong arm hadn't wrapped around his waist.

"C'mon, _vod'ika_ , lets go get some coffee." Cody said lowly in his ear, pulling Rex into his side. Rex walked listlessly beside him, letting Cody support him while he did his best to swallow down his sobs. . 

“ _Buir_?” Echo said again, slightly fearful, he couldn’t recall a time he’d ever seen his father cry before.

Jesse reached up to pet Echo’s hair, turning to walk back the way they’d come with Obi Wan at his side. 

Obi Wan smiled brightly, bouncing Fives on his hip. 

“Who wants snacks?” 

Echo shrugged, still staring over Jesse's shoulder. Fives remained silent.

Obi Wan's plastered on smile faltered at the less than enthusiastic response.

“Is Dad okay, Uncle Ben?” Fives whispered.

Obi Wan nodded, rubbing Fives' back and glancing back over his shoulder. Cody and Rex had paused at the very end of the hall, the blonde wrapped up in his brother's arms again.

“He’ll be alright, _ner'ad'ika_. But...I’m sure it would make him feel better if you both were on your best behavior for a while. And make sure to give him lots of hugs and kisses, okay?” 

They both nodded seriously, satisfied to have been given a role and a way to help. Once in the elevator both squirmed free of their Uncle's holds, each trying to beat the other to the button panel.

Obi Wan and Jesse exchanged a look that was both relief and sadness.

* * *

Instead of coffee Rex and Cody found themselves in a small exterior courtyard on the second floor. 

Rex collapsed onto a bench and immediately bent forward, head in his hands. Cody sat down beside him, laying a comforting hand on his back. 

“I’ll have to tell them...how do I tell them? They’ll be devastated.” 

Cody nodded. “But they won’t be alone. We’re all devastated.” 

Rex inhaled deeply, dropping his hands to stare at the ground. 

“I don’t know what I’m going to do. It was overwhelming when it was two on two. Now there's three of them and...” He shook his head, a broken kind of laugh whispering out of his chest. “I don’t stand a chance.” 

Cody shifted his hand up to Rex’s shoulder and squeezed. 

“You’re not alone, either.” He said. “In fact, I think all of you should come stay with Obi Wan and I for a while. Until things settle down some.” 

“No.” Rex shook his head, “I can’t ask you to do that. You and Obi Wan are barely out of the honeymoon phase.” 

"You're not asking. I'm offering. In fact, I'm insisting." Cody smiled, lightening his tone, "I intend to spend as much time as possible with my new nephew, you were very selfish with the last ones."

The corner of Rex's mouth kicked up in his best effort at a smile. "I suppose, if you both promise to keep extracurricular in the bedroom. With the tv on. Loud."

Cody rolled his eyes. “Please, _vod’ika_. We’ve been together for years. I assure you we can control ourselves for a few weeks.” 

Rex snorted, rubbing his face. “I certainly hope so. Think of the children.” 

“ _Ne’johaa_.” Cody laughed, rubbing Rex’s head roughly. Rex made to duck away from his hand but Cody caught him back around the shoulders, pulling him into his chest in a tight hug. 

Rex melted into the embrace immediately.

“Thanks, _vod_.” His voice was a whisper. 

Cody smiled, pressing a quick kiss to his brother's temple the way he hadn’t done since they were kids. 

_“Kih'parjai.”_

Rex sat up and Cody let him go. 

“They’re gonna let me take Tup home in a few hours.” Rex cleared his throat and rubbed at his eyes, Cody didn’t comment on the tears he was trying to hide. “I just need a few minutes to pull myself together...well. Fall apart and then pull myself together. Then I’ll be ready to go.” 

Cody nodded, moving to stand. 

“Alright. I’ll go find the boys. Call me if you need me.” 

Rex nodded and did his best to smile, before letting it fall away when Cody turned and left the room. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a:
> 
> ba'vodu - uncle  
> Ad'ika - little son  
> ner'ad’ika - my little son (my hc, this is a term of endearment in the Fett Clan)  
> buir - father/mother  
> ikaad - baby (referring to a very small child)  
> Ne’johaa - shut up  
> Kih'parjai - don't mention it


	3. every story must grow old

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kix has some wise words and Rex tells Fives and Echo their mom isn't coming home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so happy so many people are enjoying this! And thank you for leaving comments! I really do enjoy hearing your thoughts.
> 
> I may have discovered a mando'a translator and gotten just way too excited. I tried to hold back, though. Translations are at the end. *excited flailing* I've been thinking of placing the translations in the text though, like in italics, let me know what you think of this idea.

Cody found Obi Wan, Jesse and the twins in the main lobby of the hospital. He was about to comment on having expected to find them in the cafeteria, when he noticed Fives was sprawled out on one of the sofas in the atrium, leg hanging off the side and mouth open, utterly dead to the world. 

“Missed nap time.” Cody noted, dropping down next to Obi Wan on the couch opposite the sleeping boy. 

“Yeah, they were getting a little rowdy.” Jesse sat in one of the comfy armchairs that completed the circle of seating in the lobby disguised as a green space. Echo was sitting across his lap with Jesse’s hands clasped behind his back to keep him close as the sleeping boy drooled around his thumb and into his shirt. 

“Hows Rex?” Obi Wan asked, grabbing Cody’s hand and pulling it into his lap. 

Cody sighed and laid his head against his shoulder. How was it he could be so exhausted? He hadn’t done anything today. 

“He’s a wreck.” 

Obi Wan hmm’d and kissed his hair. “I know I would be.” 

They sat in silence for a few moments, just the disembodied elevator music that played from hidden speakers and the sound of Fives slight snoring filling the air around them. Jesse had to pull Echo's thumb out of his mouth twice when the boy pulled it back in in his sleep.

Cody sat up, looking at Obi Wan. 

“I told him they could come stay with us for a while.” 

“That's fine. Probably for the better.” 

“Yeah, if the new baby is anything like these two were he’s in for a rough few months.” Jesse quipped, smiling fondly when Echo snuffled in his sleep and shifted his head to lay on his other cheek. “I can’t imagine trying to care for a newborn by myself.” 

“He won’t be by himself.” Cody murmured staring at, but not quite seeing, the steady rise and fall of Fives' chest. He felt his hand lift and turned to see Obi Wan pressing a kiss to his knuckles.

“No. He won’t be.” 

“Jesse! Cody!” A voice called out frantically behind them. They all turned to see Kix barreling up the hallway running with the same the wild, uninhibited movements Echo and Fives did. He was coming from the other end of the hall where the ER was housed.

“Kix!” Cody stood quickly, grabbing his _vod'ika_ into a quick hug. 

“What's going on? I just got a bunch of messages from you guys saying to be here as soon as I could.” Kix was still dressed in his EMT uniform, the bags under his eyes indicative of a 12-14 hour shift behind him. “Is everyone okay? The baby?” 

“The baby is okay.” Cody assured his youngest brother. He glanced over his shoulder. Obi Wan was standing, next to Jesse held Echo close to his chest, both with matching grave looks on their faces. Quietly, he explained that in a single, twisting sweep of fate, their brother had lost his wife and their nephews had lost their mother just as Tup was brought into the world.

Kix blinked at him, then looked past him at the others and then back to Cody. 

He shook his head. “I can't believe...” He closed his eyes and looked down, Cody watched silently as he took a few deep breaths. “Do the boys know?”

Cody looked over at his sleeping nephews. Jesse had deposited Echo onto the couch beside his brother and they were both curled around each other like they had ever since they were in the womb.

“Not yet.” 

Kix sighed, pulling off his hat to rub at his bald head, scratching absently at his tattoo. “Fuck.” 

Cody nodded his agreement. Kix left his side and went to Jesse, pulling him into a quick hug before turning to do the same to Obi Wan.

"Thanks for being here, with them." Kix smiled, squeezing the red head's shoulder. "Cody will work himself to death taking care of Rex, I'm glad you're here to watch out for him."

Obi Wan glanced at Cody out of the corner of his eye to find the man rolling his eyes.

"Nothing could have kept me away."

Kix smiled. "I know."

With another quick look at his brothers, Kix turned and knelt beside the couch, placing a quick kiss on Echo's head, then leaning further over to do the same to Fives. He sighed, watching them sleep a moment, recalling the first time he'd held them in his arms in this very hospital just over five years ago.

"Nayc oyabaar iviin'yc, ner'adika. Ke'pare kyrbej." He touched Echo's cheek gently and smoothed Fives' hair off his forehead before taking a deep breath and climbing to his feet. “Where’s Rex?”

  
Kix went looking for Rex first in the little courtyard Cody had indicated, but it was empty. He ended up finding him in the nursery standing over Tup’s bassinet while the boy slept peacefully. 

_“Ori’vod.”_

Rex looked up, the look of exhaustion and sorrow that had settled unconsciously across his face replaced by surprise. 

“Kix.” Rex breathed and in two steps he was in his arms, his younger brother’s steady, calming presence a welcome reprieve from the turbulence of recent hours. 

Kix leaned back, squeezing Rex’s shoulders. 

"How are you?" 

Rex smiled sardonically, shrugging one shoulder. 

"You know, swinging violently between blind rage, shock, denial and soul crushing grief."

"Hmm. So, normal then." Kix quipped. 

Rex let out a short, startled laugh and Kix felt buoyed that he got the desired response, even if the smile did disappear almost as quickly as it had come. 

"Right."

The Fett brothers had always been close, they shared space and clothes and the same smiles and crackling wit. But for all they shared, they were quick to point out their differences too. Cody was thoughtful, reasonable, a planner to his core, where Rex was reckless, spontaneous and innovative. Jesse was the sensitive one, happier going to the movies to see a romcom than an action flick and Kix was the quiet observer, the emotional compass for the others who would often rather ignore problems than talk about them. 

So when Kix looked into his brother’s eyes, he didn’t just see the heartbreak. The man had just lost his wife, that would have been obvious to anyone. What Kix saw was all the things Rex was still trying to deny, especially to himself. 

The helplessness. The hopelessness. The fear and overwhelm. 

He saw his big brother who had always seemed unshakable and untouchable looking lost and broken and exhausted. 

He pulled Rex forward until their foreheads touched. 

“I’m sorry _vod_.” He whispered, trying to infuse his words with as much comfort and support as he could muster. 

He felt tears push against his eyelids when Rex’s hands tightened around his arms and his brother shuddered. 

“Me too.” He croaked. 

A tiny cry broke loose in the room and both men looked up. Tup’s whole face had gone red and scrunched up with the force of his tears. He’d pulled one of his arms loose from his swaddle and was shaking a tiny first in the air as if he knew and was protesting the wrong the universe had already done him that day. 

Rex looked at the baby but didn’t move. Instead Kix surged forward, gathering the tiny squalling child into his arms. 

_“Udessi, udessi ikaad,_ shhh,” Kix bounced him slightly and Tup squirmed but quieted when Kix proffered his finger, allowing him to grip it in his fist. He looked up at the strange distressed sound from Rex and saw his brother staring at the boy with too shiny eyes. 

“I don’t know what I’m going to do, Kix. How will I do this?” 

Kix bit his lip and looked down at the baby, a calming bounce in his step as me walked toward his brother.

 _“Ba'jur, beskar'gam, ara'nov, aliit, Mando'a bal Mand'alor.”_ Kix shifted Tup into Rex’s arms, watching the way the grief and fear slowly bled into something nearing bittersweet joy. He wondered if this was the first time Rex had held his newborn son. _“An vencuyan mhi.”_

Kix placed his hand at the back of Rex’s neck and squeezed. Rex looked up and met his eyes and did his best to smile.

* * *

Rex had thought _(agonized)_ long and hard over how to explain to his boys that their mother was gone and never coming home. 

In the end, he decided, there was no good way to explain that kind of thing to a child. 

So he recited the _resol'nare_ again to himself and placed a hand on the backs of both boys' heads, leading them into the private waiting room on the L&D floor. In the nursery Cody and Obi Wan were packing up Tup's things. Jesse and Kix had gone back to his home to pack them a few bags and take a few of Tup's things to his brother's condo to save them a trip. 

" _Buir?_ Wheres mommy? I need to - I need to, um, to tell her Echo and Tup are gonna share, um, share a room now." Fives announced as Rex folded himself cross legged on the floor, pulling both of them toward him. 

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about, buddy." He swallowed hard. _Just do it._ "Mommy isn't coming home with us today."

"She's not?" Echo looked up, surprised. "Tomorrow?"

Rex shook his head. Smoothing his fingers over Echo's hair a few times. 

"No. Tomorrow either. Boys...mommy's gone." 

"Gone where?"

Rex took a deep breath. "Just, gone, buddy. Passed. Marching far away."

Fives scrunched up his nose. "Why would she go marching?"

Rex huffed, frustrated with himself. Why couldn't he just fucking _say it_. Beating around the bush would only confuse them and make things worse. 

But try as he might, he couldn't bring himself to say the words. 

He dropped his head back to thud against the wall, blinking hard. 

" _Buir_?"

"You boys remember this past summer?" Rex said suddenly, "After Grandpa Jango's funeral? You remember what I taught you?"

"We say the names." Echo said, solemnly.

"Yeah, everyday at bedtime because Grandpa isn't, um, isn't coming back no more. But when we say his name he can be _darasuum_." Fives added, his normal exuberance dampened somewhat by the subject matter.

Rex nodded, swallowing hard. 

"Well, from now on, when we say Grandpa's name, we...now we are going to say mommy's name too."

Both boys stared back at him for several quiet moments. 

Echo seemed to understand first. His eyes filled with tears and his chin began to tremble. 

_"Taab'echaaj'la?"_ He whispered in a broken squeak. Rex nodded, cupping his round face in his hands. 

_"Lek, ner'ikaad."_

His brown eyes fell shut and fat, silent tears began to roll down his face. Rex gathered Echo to his chest, kissing his hair. "I'm sorry, baby. I'm sorry." Echo never made a sound, but Rex felt his shirt growing wetter by the moment and his small shoulders trembled against him.

Fives stared confused at his brother for several seconds, his gaze flicking back and forth between _vod_ and _buir_. 

Where Echo's understanding was immediate and his reaction one of quiet despair, Fives took longer and was explosive when realization dawned.

"No." He scrambled to his feet. "No. _NO!_ I want mommy! Where is she?" He didn't wait for an answer, instead he ran toward the door, flinging it open and rushing out into the hall. "Mommy! Mommy where are you!?" 

"Fives!" Rex called, attempting to clamor to his feet without relaxing his grip on Echo. Before he could get to him Fives' escape was cut short. Cody had been walking beside Obi Wan, who had Tup in a baby carrier, when he heard Fives desperate cry behind him. He turned to see the little boy tearing out into the hall, his face red and scrunched up in anger, fists pumping at his sides as he ran. Dropping the diaper bag, Cody reached out and caught Fives up into his arms. The little boy struggled, kicking and screaming and doing his best to squirm out of his uncle's hold. 

"No no _nonono_!! Let me go, I want mommy. **_MOMMY_ _!_** _"_

Cody held fast, folding the boy tightly against him, blinking away his blurred vision.

 _"Udessi, udessi, ad'ika."_ He whispered over and over until Fives' screams morphed into loud, tortured sobs and instead of struggling he clung to Cody's neck like a lifeline. Tup, disturbed by the noise, also started to cry and in the back of his mind Cody heard Obi Wan attempting to calm him.

Cody looked back the way Fives had come to see Rex standing in the doorway to the waiting room, clutching Echo to his chest. His brother was crying almost as hard as Fives and Cody's heart broke at the sight of it. Without thinking, they started toward one another, Cody drawing an arm up to pull Rex toward him and they leaned in close, pressing the boys’ backs together as Cody’s pulled Rex's forehead against his own.

Cody hoped, as he listened to his _aliit_ 's shared grief fill the air, that this would be the hardest day. That, somehow, from now on things would be easier. 

He hoped, but he didn't dare pray. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a: 
> 
> Ba'jur, beskar'gam, ara'nov, aliit, Mando'a bal Mand'alor. An vencuyan mhi - Education, armor, Self-defense, our tribe, Our language, our leader. All help us survive. (The Resol'Nare /six actions law)  
> darasuum - eternal  
> taab'echaaj'la - deceased, passed on (lit: marched far away)  
> Lek - yeah (short for Elek)  
> Ner'ikaad - my baby  
> nayc oyabaar iviin'yc - don't wake up too soon, sleep while you can  
> Ke'pare kyrbej - a battlefield awaits


	4. comfort came against my will

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rex is not good at coping and Cody is not good at coping with that. Obi Wan is the only emotional adult. Which is probably the most AU thing in this whole fic tbh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They need hugs people!!

Rex sat on the back porch steps of Obi Wan and Cody’s condo, staring out into the narrow, grassy garden. Beside him sat two empty beer bottles, a third, half full, dangled from his fingertips. 

He was still in his black suit but had loosened his tie and undone the top two buttons on his shirt. 

The graveside service had been simple and brief, Rex hadn’t cried when they lowered his wife into the ground and he didn’t question why. He guessed it was possible there were just no more tears left in his body. 

The sun had sunk below the horizon almost half an hour ago, the buzz of cicada bugs filled the humid late summer air and the light was dwindling fast, taking the day from dusk to night far quicker than Rex was ready for. 

Behind him the door to the house opened just long enough for him to hear the din of conversation of the dozen or so cousins that were still hanging around. The door closed again and Rex expected to hear Cody’s heavy footsteps, or maybe Kix’s, approaching. 

Instead, the soft shuffle of decidedly smaller feet, accompanied by the tell-tale dragging of shoelaces, indicated a much younger interloper. 

Rex lifted his arm without prompting and Echo dropped onto the step beside him and shrugged underneath it meshing into his father’s side without comment. 

Both boys had been clingy all day, but Echo especially so, not that Rex blamed him. He was a little surprised though. Echo had always been closer to his wife, relishing in the attentions and coddling she lavished on him (sometimes despite Rex’s protests) while Fives tended to be Rex’s shadow. 

Somehow, since leaving the hospital, the roles had been somewhat reversed. Now, every time Rex turned around Echo was slipping his hand into his (and attempting to sneak his thumb into his mouth) and Fives could usually be found hanging off of Cody or Obi Wan, even more loud and boisterous than usual. The little boy hardly seemed effected at all by his mother’s sudden absence and the subdued mood of the adults around him. 

_“Buir?”_

Rex glanced down, sliding his hand up Echo’s arm in an attempt to tug the boy’s thumb from his mouth. “Stop sucking your thumb, Echo.” 

Echo’s eyebrows knitted together and he pressed his face into Rex’s jacket, keeping his thumb stubbornly in place. 

“Not sucking. Just holding it.” 

Rex sighed, too tired to argue. He brought his beer to his lips. 

“What did you want to ask?” 

“Do we live here now?” 

It had only been a few days, but they hadn’t been home once, relying on Jesse to ferry any items they needed out to the condo. Rex wasn’t surprised the kid was confused. It had been a confusing couple of days.

“No. Just staying for a little while. Your _ba’vodu_ want to help with Tup.” Rex squeezed his shoulders, reassuring him. 

Echo sighed. “Maybe Tup can stay here. Me and Fives and you go home.” 

Rex snorted. “You don’t want to bring your baby brother?” 

Echo’s head rubbed back and forth against his chest. “No. Loud.” 

As if on queue a tiny cry rang out inside the house. Rex tensed, but was more than a little relieved when it quieted again seconds later. Probably Obi Wan had gotten him. Rex felt a bit badly for how often he was letting his brother’s _cyar’ika_ take care of Tup instead of him. But he just...needed a little more time.

“You were loud.” Rex informed Echo, draining the last of his beer. 

“Nu-uh. Fives was.” He said, sounding slightly garbled as he pushed the words out around his thumb.

“Oh, he was.” Rex agreed, smiling slightly. “But so were you.” 

Echo huffed, put out by the information. Echo started to move restlessly and Rex set aside his third empty bottle when the little boy scrambled up into his lap. With a deep sigh, he wrapped his little boy in his arms, tucking his head under his chin and taking as much comfort from the boy’s quiet presence as Echo got from his. 

“Love you, _buir_.” He whispered.

Rex kissed Echo’s hair and stared up at the sky as the first stars began to shine. 

“Love you too, _ner'ad'ika_.”

Rex carried a snoring Echo inside an hour later. The house had cleared out of the well wishers and extended family by then. He tucked the little boy into the bed the three of them were sharing and shed his jacket and tie before heading back downstairs. 

“We’re not going to have to cook for weeks.” Obi wan was saying in the kitchen, stroking his beard as he peered into the stuffed fridge. There were still at least three casserole dishes on the counter he needed to find a way to make room for. 

Cody sat at the island watching him, beer in hand. “I think that's the idea, _cyare_.” 

Obi Wan hmm’d and looked up to see Rex had appeared in the kitchen doorway. 

“Rex. There you are.” He reached for a plate of food covered in plastic wrap. “I saved you a plate.” 

Rex shook his head. “No thanks. Still not hungry.” 

Obi Wan pursed his lips, but didn’t argue, instead producing another beer and proffering it to him. 

“I’ve already had three.” 

“Who cares.” Cody said, “I think if anyone deserves to get shitfaced today it’s you. And I’m certainly planning to, so you have to otherwise I’ll look like an irresponsible adult.” 

“You look like that anyway.” Rex said, rolling his eyes. “I don’t want to be hung over tomorrow.” 

“What’s tomorrow?” 

Rex shifted on his feet, shoving his hands into his pockets. “I’m headed into the station tomorrow.” 

Cody looked up sharply. “What are you talking about?” 

Rex shrugged. “My squads on call.” 

“There's a backup squad,” Cody countered hotly. Rex spotted an empty bottle beside him. Cody was always a little more short tempered when he was buzzed. “SWAT will survive for a few days while you grieve your fucking wife. I can’t believe your Captain wouldn’t approve your bereavement leave, I’ll kill that son of a-.”

“He did.” 

Cody and Obi Wan both blinked. 

“Well then I don’t-.”

“I told him I’d come in.”

“Rex-.”

“Look, if you can’t watch the boys I’ll take them to daycare and-.”

This time it was Cody’s turn to interrupt. “Like hell you will.” 

“I agree,” Obi Wan said, putting a restraining hand on Cody’s shoulder when he started to climb to his feet, a look like danger in his eyes. “I don’t have classes tomorrow, I can watch them.” 

“Yeah, and I _do_ have bereavement because I'm not a fucking _di’kut_ so I’ll be here too.” 

“Cody,” Rex’s voice was a warning. 

“Vod. You’re _wife_ just died.” 

Rex’s face shuttered so fast it was nearly audible. 

“Gee. Thanks Cody. I’d almost forgot.” 

Cody didn’t apologize, staring his brother down with a dark look, which Rex returned with the same venom, the air thick and tense. Obi Wan looked between them several times, not daring to move. He wondered if this was one of those times when he should let the Fett brothers work things out themselves or if he should step in. 

Before he could decide, the moment was broken by Fives clamoring into the room, a toy car in one hand, a movie in the other. 

“ _Ba’vodu_ Ben, can I watch Cars?” 

“No.” It was Rex who answered and Fives whirled around to him. “It’s bedtime.” 

“But I don’t wanna go to bed.” Fives whined. 

“Too bad. It’s been a long day. You need to go to sleep.” 

“But I’m not tired.” He insisted, pouting and completely undercutting his argument by scrubbing a fist against his eyes. 

“Yes, you are, Fives. I can tell by the way you’re whining right now.” Rex finally broke away from his brother’s gaze, closing his eyes and rubbing his forehead. 

“No I’m not.” Fives stamped a little foot in protest. “This isn’t fair.” 

“Fives,” Rex took a deep breath,attempting to breathe through his irritation. He felt old and exhausted and _raw_. He just needed this day to end. “Why are you doing this?” 

“I’m not tired. I’m really not, _buir_ please!”

“Fives!” Rex snapped, his voice as sharp as a knife and all three of the people in the room stiffened immediately. “Get your ass upstairs, _now_. I’m not gonna tell you again.” 

A beat of six seconds where no one moved, and then Fives’ face crumpled. His fingers went lax and both the car and movie clattered to the kitchen floor. 

“I don’t wanna go to bed without a g’night kiss.” He managed through tears. “Mommy always kisses me goodnight.” The last few words dissolved in sobs and Fives slowly sank to the floor. 

Rex's breath hitched. He wished the ground would swallow him up.

He’d never felt so low. 

Or like such a bad father. 

Of course Fives was hurting. Just because his five year old mind couldn’t figure out how to express it in a way Rex could see didn’t mean he wasn’t. 

Rex started toward him, reaching out. “ _Ni ceta, ikaad._ I didn’t mean it.” 

Fives jumped away from him, instead turning to seek comfort from Cody who immediately pulled him into his lap, cooing softly as Fives cried into his neck. 

“It’s alright, _ad’ika_. I’ve got you.” 

Rex watched Obi Wan lean over to place a kiss on Fives’ head, rubbing his back soothingly and he took a deep breath. 

He didn’t deserve them. Any of them. 

Not knowing what else to do he turned and left the room. 

Cody swallowed the urge to call his name and instead watched him go silently.

“He’ll feel better in the morning,” Obi Wan murmured, reading his thoughts as always. 

Cody leaned back against his husband’s chest. 

“I hope you’re right.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wha?? Hardly any Mando'a in this one. Gonna have to load up the next I guess. 
> 
> Thanks for your lovely comments all!!
> 
> Mando'a:  
> Ni ceta - I'm sorry (lit: I kneal) groveling apology.


	5. maybe you were the ocean, when I was just a stone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rex's walls are cracking and Cody has a parent/teacher conference.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Wheels are turning  
>  I remember when you were mine  
> Now just to reach you  
> Baby, I'd stand in line  
> But there's another world  
> We're living in tonight  
> And there's another heart  
> That's fading in the light  
> Don't want your picture  
> On my cell phone  
> I want you here with me  
> \- Here with Me by The Killers _
> 
> Cuz this song actually hurt my heart when listening to it while writing this.

_"Ba'vodu!"_

Obi Wan yelped when Echo launched himself out of his arms and toward Jesse, who had to jump forward to keep the kid from taking a nose dive to the floor. 

_"Jate at haa'taylir gar, ad'ika."_ Jesse smiled, ruffling Echo's hair before placing him on his feet. Echo barely paused before running off to join his brother on the thick mats, who had run right past Jesse with barely a wave.

Obi Wan sighed. "Be careful!" 

"We're always careful, _ba'vodu_ Ben!" Fives called back, pulling off his shoes. "I'm gonna climb to the top today!" He thrust a finger out to the rock wall that extended two stories up.

"Not without a harness you're not." Jesse countered immediately. 

"Aw man!" Came the plaintive response.

Obi Wan rolled his eyes but smiled fondly. 

"Don't worry, Obi Wan." Jesse clapped a big hand onto his brother in law's shoulder. "They're in good hands." 

"Oh, it's not that." He shook his head, dropping the boys' backpacks behind the counter with Jesse's things. "It's just that they're magnets for trouble." 

"It's a Fett thing." Jesse shrugged, the grin on his face said he was more pleased than perturbed by the fact. 

" _Ba'vodu,_ can we have shoes?" Only Echo's eyes and the top of his hair were visible over the countertop. 

Jesse leaned down to pull out two small pairs of climbing shoes. 

"You wait until I'm over there, alright? No climbing above the yellow line." Jesse reminded him. He pointed at the line that traced a height of five feet on all the walls in the gym. 

"Yes sir." Echo grinned, taking the shoes and scurrying back to Fives who was somersaulting from one end of the mats to the other.

Jesse chuckled and looked over to where Obi Wan had pulled a bag of pretzels, two apples and two water bottles with superheroes on them from his leather messenger bag. 

"Thanks again for doing this, Jesse, I completely forgot I agreed to cover Dr. Sinube's lecture today." 

Jesse just smiled and waved him off. "It's no problem. In fact, maybe they should just stay over at my place tonight? You look like you could use a break." 

"Do I?" Obi Wan glanced down at himself. It was not a pretty sight. 

His shirt was wrinkled and half un-tucked, a thread was hanging down from his cardigan where the button had been torn loose when it got caught in one of Fives' action figures and he'd tried to make it "Fly" away. There was a jelly stain on one leg of his khaki trousers and, if he wasn't mistaken, a bulldozer in his pocket. 

He looked back up at Jesse and grinned sheepishly. "I suppose I do. That would be lovely Jesse. Thank you." 

Jesse smiled crookedly and stepped forward, brushing Obi Wan's hair down where it was sticking up at odd angles in the back. 

"Don't mention it, _vod_." 

* * *

  
Rex had been working his normal hours for a couple weeks, Cody's protests and Obi Wan's silent brooding. 

He'd hoped getting back into his routine would get his mind off the million things swirling around in his head.

Tup's neonatal acne and the doctor's appointments he had for his three week and two month checkups. The citation they got from the city for the lawn being too long because every time Rex went to do it he ended up laying in bed clutching his wife's pillow, staring at the wall until Cody called him wondering where he was. The fact that Fives had outgrown his shoes but Echo had outgrown his pants. The three missed calls from their teacher on his phone that he was ignoring. Where were his keys? When was his dentist appointment? What was the password to the website to pay the electric bill? 

Things he didn't used to worry about because _she_ took care of them.

But instead of distracting him from things he didn't want to think about, work only stressed him further. His emotions felt stretched too thin after two hostage negotiations, a bomb threat, an armed robbery and a drug sting in his first weeks back on duty. He wasn't sleeping and downtime at work was spent in the shooting range instead of on his required paperwork. 

He knew his captain was giving him a break and passing off the work, but he didn't know how long it would last. 

Rex emptied another magazine into the paper target at the end of the shooting range, a near perfect grouping of holes in the center.

_"Rex!"_

A pressure on his shoulder surprised him and Rex whirled around, clocking the person on the jaw before he even realized he was moving. 

"Kix!" 

"Ow." His younger brother pushed himself into a sitting position on the floor, rubbing a hand over his jaw. 

"Dammit Kix." Rex pulled off his ear protection and safety glasses. "You know better than that." He reached out and pulled his brother to his feet, then yanked him over until he was standing directly under a light. "Let me look at you, _vod'ika."_

Rex tilted Kix's head back and to the side, the spot where he'd hit him was already red and swelling. 

"Ah, shit, Rex. That hurt." 

"It was your bright idea to surprise me like that." Rex grumbled. He stepped back and jerked his head. "C'mon. If we don't get some ice on that you'll be eating through a straw for a week." 

Rex dumped an ice pack into Kix's lap and settled down on the bench beside him. He'd taken him into the locker rooms outside the gun range where most of the men changed in or out of their uniforms at shift change. Since it was mid afternoon, the place was deserted. 

"Thanks." Kix muttered. He hissed when the cold-pack touched his sore jaw. 

Rex just grunted, leaning back against the cinder block wall taking measured, deep breaths. He was getting a migraine.

Again. 

"I assume you didn't come all this way to be my punching bag." He said after a few minutes of silence. 

He heard Kix shift beside him and the crinkle of the ice pack when he put it on the bench on his other side. 

"No, I didn't." 

Rex cracked one eye open. "What, then?"

Kix almost winced. "I just talked to Cody." 

Rex swore. "You did, did you? And what did Mr. High and Mighty have to say today." 

"Rex," Kix sounded tired and leaned forward, propping his elbows on his legs, his skin showing through the holes in the knees of his jeans. "That's not fair and you know it." 

Rex snorted a bitter laugh. "You really gonna talk to me about fair, Kix? Me and Lady Justice haven't exactly been on speaking terms lately." 

Kix just leveled a straight stare at him and in spite of himself Rex dropped his gaze to the floor. 

"I'm doing the best I can, Kix." He said, sounding more vulnerable than he meant. Kix was probably the only person in the world he could show that side of himself to anymore. Cody was too like himself, stubborn and inflexible. But Kix had a way of making Rex feel seen and reassured even when he didn't say anything and it made his chest hurt to see it on his face. 

She had been like that too. 

"I know you are, Rex." Kix reached over to squeeze his brother's forearm. "But you're pushing yourself too hard. You should let us help you, otherwise you're gonna burn out." 

Rex didn't say that he knew that. That he almost wanted that. Burn out, blissful nothingness, would almost be easier than the hell he felt like he was slogging through everyday. 

Almost. 

"You can't do that." Kix continued, his voice gentle. "It's not just about you, you know. Fives and Echo and Tup, they need you too." 

Rex's eyes snapped up to his brother's and Kix blinked at how quickly the pain and exhaustion left his face, replaced by outrage. 

"You think I don't know that? You think that those boys aren't the first thing on my mind when I wake up and the last thing I think of before I go to sleep? But the world didn't stop spinning that day even though it should have. I still have other responsibilities I have to take care of." 

"Responsibilities like spending hours after every shift in the gun range?" Kix snapped. "Like working double shifts and overtime while your brothers take care of your kids because you can't bring yourself to?" Kix took a breath, consciously making his voice lower when he caught sight of Rex's hands fisted in his lap, the tension across his brother's shoulders so tight he looked like he might snap in two. "Rex I understand that-"

“You ever been married?” Rex hissed, “You ever lost your wife, _vod?”_

Kix sighed, deflated. “You know I haven’t.” 

“That’s right. You haven’t. So you don't _understand_. You’ve never had to put the love of your life in the ground. Or go home to three little boys who are looking at you to solve the worlds problems all by yourself when you feel like the whole thing is imploding. And until you have, Kix, any advice you have on how to grieve can fuck right off.” Rex snatched the ice pack off the bench and got up, storming out of the locker room. 

“Rex, wait.” 

The only answer was the slamming locker room door.

"Well," he sighed into the silence. "That could have gone better."

* * *

It was when her fifth call to Rex Fett went unanswered that Jocasta Nu went to the next number on her emergency contact list. Cody, still the responsible boy she remembered, had promised to arrive that day when he got off shift. 

"Mrs. Nu?" 

A knock on her classroom door made her look up and Jocasta smiled. 

"Cody. It's good to see you. My my you've grown since the last time I saw you in this room." 

"Yeah. Twenty something years will do that to a guy." Cody smiled, rubbing the back of his neck. He looked around. The kindergarten room at Tipoca Elementary hadn't changed much since he was there. The same tiny blue chairs and carpet squares in the corner, bright colored alphabet plastered to the wall. 

"I've been calling Rex but, I haven't been able to get a hold of him." 

He turned back around to face the old woman, she hadn't changed either. Still wore those ugly but sensible dark shoes, long plain dresses and had her hair pinned back in a bun with chopsticks. 

"Yeah...he's been...busy." Cody shrugged and rubbed his face. "It's been a rough couple of weeks." 

Jocasta made a sympathetic noise. "Yes, well, I think that may have something to do with why I called you. I wanted to speak to Rex because I’ve made some concerning observations about Fives’ behavior recently.” She made a gesture to one of the only full size chairs in the room and he pulled it over to where she'd settled behind her desk.

“What kind of things?” 

“Well, Fives has always been well liked by the other children." Mrs. Nu folded her hands in her lap. "He’s friendly, outgoing...a bit of a troublemaker, but nothing I can't handle." A sparkle in her eye made Cody think she might be teasing him. He knew he and Rex were probably responsible for at least a handful of the grey hairs on her head.

Her smile faded. "Lately, however, he’s been having much more trouble getting along with the others. He’s taking toys and supplies without permission. Getting into fights and...even when I’ve observed what happened, he refuses to tell the truth.” 

“He’s _lying?”_ Cody's eyebrows shot up. There were many things tolerated in the Fett house, but there were some things that were just not done. Certain codes and ideals passed down from their father and his father before him that the Fetts did not go against. Lying was one of them. 

It was not the way of a _mando'ade_. 

Cody knew Fives and Echo knew that as well as he did. 

“Please don’t misunderstand, Cody. Fives is not a bad boy. He’s...struggling. I know their mother just passed unexpectedly." She paused but Cody congratulated himself on not flinching. "I think this behavior is...more of a cry for attention than anything else. It's a phase and it will pass. My main concern is to know that he and Echo both are getting the support they need at home.” 

“I see." Cody sighed. "Thank you. I'll bring this to Rex, we'll do our best to help Fives in anyway we can.”

Mrs. Nu smiled. "I know you will."

Cody nodded and started to get up when Mrs. Nu tilted her head as if something had just occurred to her.

“Before you go, could I ask, who is Tup?” 

“Tup? That’s the new baby. Why?" 

“Ah, that does explain a few things.” She stared off for a moment, tapping her chin with her index finger.

“What kind of things?” 

“Well, Echo’s behavior hasn’t really changed recently. He’s always been quiet.” She turned and began rummaging through piles of paper on her desk, overturning a tube of glitter and upsetting a small potted succulent in the process. 

“Hard to get a word in edgewise with Fives around.” Cody smiled slightly, leaning forward to right the objects for her.

"Yes, it can be." Jocasta laughed softly to herself as she pulled out a piece of paper from the middle of the third pile. "But he has been drawing more.” 

She handed Cody the paper. The top of the page had a spiky yellow sun in the corner and puffy blue clouds. In the top right there was a drawing of a female stick figure in a box with a big ‘x’ over it. Below that there stood a family of stick figures, a mom and dad and two children of the same size. And further over toward the edge was a tiny stick figure drawn underground with what looked like a rudimentary grave marker drawn above it.

Cody didn’t need to be a child psychologist to know what it meant. But it made him feel too hot and too cold at the same time.

“Cody," She drew his gaze, laying a soft, warm hand over his. "I would like to emphasize, this is nothing to be horrified by. Echo is certainly not the first little boy to wish his life was the way it used to be before a new baby came along. But...with the added knowledge of having lost their mother I just...again. I wanted to be sure they were getting the support they need. I know you and your brothers are close. I have no doubt you can be there for these boys the way they need you to be.“ She smiled kindly and Cody dropped his eyes back to the drawing.

“Yes. Thank you Mrs. Nu. I appreciate you letting me know." His voice hardened slightly. "I’ll talk to Rex.” 

“Don’t be too hard on him Cody." She said with a sad smile. "He’s grieving too.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mando'a:
> 
> Jate at haa'taylir gar - good to see you
> 
> Theres a lot of mando'a in the next one to make up for the pitiful lack in this one.


	6. see the sky is no man's land

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rex gets the hugs he so desperately needs and realizes he doesn't have to do everything himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well this is it. I'm so happy people enjoyed it. Thanks for all the kind comments!
> 
> Here we earn our gratuitous mando'a tag.

When Cody arrived home from the meeting with Fives and Echo's teacher he was already upset. So when he spotted Rex's car in the driveway he was went three fourths of the way to livid. 

Obi Wan blinked up at him from the living room when he swung open the door, barely managing not to slam it behind him. 

"Cody? What's wrong?" He sat up from where he was curled in the armchair with a book.

"Where. Is he?" Cody growled, gripping his keys so tight they were digging into his palm.

Obi Wan raised an eyebrow. He closed his book and pulled his glasses off, setting them both to the side before unfurling from his blanket and crossing the room. He placed one hand on both his arms and leaned forward to press his forehead to Cody's. 

"Breathe, _cyare_. Tell me what's going on." 

Cody was practically vibrating, anger and accusations and grief swirling in a mess in his head, but he let Obi Wan's calming presence soothe some of his sharp edges. 

"He...the boys..." 

Obi Wan leaned back to look him in the eyes. 

"He can't go on like this, Obi Wan. It has to stop. I've got to find a way to get through to him." 

Obi Wan took a deep breath, rubbing up and down his arms a moment. He nodded. 

"The boys are upstairs having a nap, so take this outside, please." He leaned up onto his tiptoes to kiss the corner of Cody's mouth. "I love you. And don't forget you love him too." 

Cody grunted. 

"He's in the den." 

Cody dragged Rex out back by his forearm, saying nothing though his brother demanded repeatedly to know what the hell he thought he was doing.

He released Rex roughly and he stumbled down the steps. Righting himself, he whirled around, eyes thunderous.

 _"Copaani mirshmure'cye, vod?"_ Rex exclaimed, shoving away from him.

 _"Ne'johaa. Ni jorhaa'ir, gar sushir. Tayli'bac?"_ Rex opened his mouth to respond but Cody silenced him with a look. _"Ne shab'rud'nio._ "

Rex narrowed his eyes but waited silently as Cody came to stand in front of him on the grass.

"Got a call from Fives and Echo's teacher today. Had a very interesting talk with her."

For all Rex was on the verge of decking his brother, the words caught him off guard.

 _"Me'ven?"_ He took a half step back. "What did she say?"

"Well, seeing as you're not a fucking adult who answers their phone, I'm not sure if I'm going to tell you." Cody said, going his brother at the bottom of the steps and crowding into his space.

 _"Nar'sheb_ Cody." Rex snapped. "I've been busy, alright? I was going to call her back." 

"And yet you didn't. She called you so many times with no response she had to call _me_ to make sure you were still alive."

"I don't need this." Rex just shook his head, turning to stomp back inside the house.

"Sure. Run away, Rex. That solves everything." Cody called.

Rex flipped him off over his shoulder.

"You about done feeling sorry for yourself yet, _vod_?" Rex stopped cold. Cody kept going. "Cause I'm about done watching you."

Rex turned around slowly, his face twisted in hurt and anger.

"What did you just say to me?"

"You heard me. These past three weeks you've been hiding. Afraid to face you're life so you do your best not to live it. I'm sick of it."

Cody saw the punch coming. Rex couldn't have telegraphed it more if he'd sent a letter (it was a testament to how tired he was that he did, Rex was better than that).

Cody let him.  
  
Pain exploded in his jaw and he braced himself for the wind to be knocked out of him when he landed on the ground. Rex came to stand over him, fists clenched at his sides.

"I'm getting pretty sick and tired of people telling me how I'm allowed to grieve my fucking wife."

Cody wiped blood off the corner of his mouth, climbing back to his feet.

"Hope you feel better cause that's the only free hit you're gonna get."

"I don't need any more."

Rex launched himself at Cody, who ducked two jabs before landing a punch at Rex's kidney. He spun away from it with a grunt and swung around with another punch, still too unfocused so that he telegraphed it again and Cody easily sidestepped and used his inertia to throw him away from him. Rex pivoted but wasn't able to keep his balance, instead latching onto Cody's arm and sending them both crashing to the ground.

"Why do you have to be so stubborn?" Cody demanded.

"Why do you always think you have all the answers?" Rec shot back.

Rex pulled back for another punch but Cody was quicker, flipping him over and pulling his hand behind his back as if he was slapping cuffs on a perp. Rex, anticipating this, slammed his had back, narrowly missing Cody's nose and instead getting another good hit on his already sore jaw. Cody swore and shoved his shoulders down into the dirt with his body.

"You don't understand," Rex shouted, scrambling beneath Cody. "You don't know _what it's like_."

"Maybe I don't, but _they_ do. You're abandoning them." Cody grabbed Rex's shoulders to still them, trying to make him listen. "They _need_ you."

"No! They need _her_." With a final shove Rex freed himself from Cody's bulk and rolled away onto his hands and knees.

Dropping his chin to his chest, Rex breathed hard through an ache in his lungs that had nothing to do with the fight. He felt a trickle of liquid sliding down his cheek from his temple and wondered absently if it was sweat or blood. 

"Is that what you think?" Cody said, voice hoarse. He wiped his palms, smeared with blood and dirt, on the thighs of his jeans. "Rex. You're their father. Their _buir_. Don't you know how much they look up to you?"

Rex was still facing away from him, staring at the ground. He didn't answer.

"Echo blames Tup for her death."

“What?" That got Rex's attention. He looked up. "What do you mean?”

"Mrs. Nu showed me a picture he drew. He wishes he was dead instead of her."

Rex dropped his eyes back to the ground. Was that true? Did his son really wish his brother had taken his mother's place that day? Had he screwed things up that badly?

"You know why he feels that way Rex?" Cody paused a beat but Rex stayed silent. “Because you do, Rex.”

“ _Ne’johaa_ Cody." Rex said, his head snapping up with a glare. "I love that boy.”

“I know you do. I didn’t say you didn’t love him. I said you blame him.” Cody pointed back toward the condo. "You’ve been living here for three weeks and I don’t think I’ve seen you spend three hours with him. If he wakes up in the middle of the night Obi Wan is the one who gets up. I took him to his first checkup and Jesse filled his diaper rash prescription. Did you even know he _had_ diaper rash?" Cody shook his head, feeling his heart break all over again at the sight of this tired, hopeless man staring back at him where his brother ought to be. "Rex, you've always been so in love with being a father...you used to talk about it before we were even dating for fucks sake. Why are you acting like this? Its not Tup's fault."

"I fucking know that!" Rex said, his voice somewhere between pleading and desperate. "I know it's not his fault but I just...I can’t...I can't even _look_ at him, Cody! Every time I do all I can see is her _face_ and how much she _wanted_ him. How she dreamed and planned and waited for him. She never even got to hold him, Cody. He’ll never know her smile or, or her laugh. Fives and Echo...they’ll forget her too. Our room...it used to smell so much like her I would expect to turn around and see her. Now...” His voice broke and he turned his gaze to the ground, shoulders shaking with the effort of holding himself together.

“She’s not gone _vod_." Cody said gently, the pain in his brother's voice bringing tears to his eyes. "Just marching far away.”

“That doesn’t fucking help, Cody!” Rex protested vehemently, pressing a hand to the bridge if his nose. He sniffed, trying hard not to sob.

He was so _tired_ of crying. 

"Why didn't anyone tell me we were going to spar tonight?" A loud, familiar voice called out. Rex and Cody looked up to see Jesse on the back porch steps, Kix right behind him. 

Cody swore, he forgot they were coming over for dinner tonight. Something of a 'thank you' for all their help lately.

"You guys alright?" Kix asked, ever the emotional barometer for the Fett brothers. He kept a staying hand on Jesse's arm to keep him from rushing out to his brothers. Cody didn't respond, turning his gaze back to Rex who had sat back and crossed his arms over his knees, face pressed into them.

Cody moved to kneel right beside him and putting a hand on both his shoulders.

“You’re right. Okay, you’re right. And it’s not fair and none of you deserve this... but it’s done." He said quietly, ignoring his brothers for now. He gave Rex's shoulders a squeeze. "But you know what’s worse than losing your mother? Losing your father too. _Gar taldin ni jaonyc; gar sa buir, ori'wadaas'la._ You, are an amazing father, Rex. You have been _my_ role model of what a father should be for years. And those boys need you, vod. Now more than ever.”

Rex stared at his brother, not sure if he was more shocked at the admission or the tears in Cody's eyes.

“I know she was your _riduur_. Your soul mate. And I know it hurts to just fucking _breathe_ sometimes. But you still have her. Here,” he put a hand over Rex’s heart, then lifted to point back toward the condo. “And right in there. Inside that house there are three huge pieces of her heart that are just waiting for you to make them whole again.”

Rex swallowed several times, fighting for his voice.

"Cody I," He pursed his lips, then forced himself to continue. "I don't know if I can. I'm not...I can't do this alone."

Cody smiled. "I keep trying to tell you Rex. You're not alone. You have your _Aliit_." He tiled his head, forcing Rex to keep his eyes when he tried to look away. "You are my blood. And so are those boys. And there is _nothing_ anyone could do to keep me away. That includes you." 

Rex's chin started to tremble and Cody pulled into his arms, holding him tight. Rex hiccuped against him several times, hiding his face in his neck. Moments later Cody felt another set of strong, large arms warp around them, and then another. 

Jesse. Kix.

Rex noticed it too because he made a noise that was both a laugh and a cry.

 _"Vor entye vode."_ He managed, muffled against Cody's shirt.

 _"K'uur_ , _vod_. We've got you," Cody promised quietly. _"Ni solus, vod'ika.Vi ti gar ratiin."_

Several minutes later, Rex relaxed and the other three slowly began to peel away. Rex sat back on his haunches, wiping his eyes, face red to the tips of his ears from crying and embarrassment. 

"Fuck." He muttered, to himself. 

"I'll say. I came over her for steak, not a love fest." Jesse said, climbing to his feet with a mock irritated look on his face even as he wiped tears out of his eyes. 

Kix rolled his eyes. "Well you could have done us all a favor and showered before you came." 

"Yeah _vod_. I almost lost my appetite." Cody snarked. 

Rex chuckled under his breath, well aware they were trying to take the attention off him and loving them all the more for it. Cody reached out and he let him help him to his feet. 

"And you two," Kix thrust a finger at Rex and Cody. "Come let me check and see if you've done any permanent damage to yourselves. You're no spring chickens you know." 

"Hey!" Came the indignant reply from both of them.

"If anyone is hurt it's Cody. He's older." 

"By five minutes!" 

The four of them bickered all the way into the house, where Obi Wan had food ready and was entertaining Echo and Fives with a movie and blatant bribery of dinner ruining snacks.

That night, after Kix left for his shift and Jesse, four beers deep, had crashed on the couch, the rest of the Fett clan made their way upstairs to their rooms. Rex surprised Cody when he asked if his _vod_ would mind taking over bath duties that night. Cody had given him a long look, seeing trepidation and determination in his face, and then nodded with a smile, ushering Fives and Echo into the bathroom.

An hour and at least a gallon of water on the bathroom floor later, he led the twins to the room they were sharing with Rex, surprised to see Rex was there, sprawled out in an armchair, already asleep. He was even more surprised to see baby Tup, head tucked under Rex's chin and held securely against his father's chest, fast asleep as well. Rex looked as content as Cody had ever seen him. 

He smiled, watching the thoughtful look on both boy's faces as they crawled into the double bed, eyeing their father and baby brother across the room. 

_"Ca'jate, ner'ad'ike."_ He kissed them both on the forehead, tucking the covers in tightly around them. _"Jahaala nuhoy."_

"Ca'jate _ba'vodu_." The boys responded drowsily, already drifting off. 

Cody then went across the room and gently gathered Tup up off of Rex's chest. Rex stirred immediately.

 _"K'uur,"_ Cody whispered. "Just gonna go put him in his crib." 

"I can-"

"I got it. Get some sleep." 

After a moment Rex nodded, standing out of the chair and pulling off his shirt.

"Cody?" 

Cody stopped at the door and turned back, peeing across the darkness at Rex.

"I'm gonna take some time off work. Focus on them for a while." He said, giving a soft smile so his sleeping sons.

Cody smiled. "I think that's a good idea. Love you, Rex. Sleep well." 

"Love you too, _ori'vod. Ca'jate._ "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MY SOFT BOOOIIISSSS. Whew. That was a lot of emotions. Thanks so much to everyone who stuck with me and left such sweet comments. I hope you enjoyed this!
> 
> Mandoa: 
> 
> "Copaani mirshmure'cye, vod?" - Are you looking for a smack in the face, mate?  
> Ne'johaa. Ni jorhaa'ir, gar sushir. Tayli'bac? - Shut up. I talk, you listen. Got it? (aggressive)  
> Ne shab'rud'nio - don't test me (often followed by physical violence)  
> Me'ven - huh? Expression of bewilderment or disbelief  
> Nar'sheb - Contemptuous comment - like *shove it* but much stronger.  
> k'uur - hush  
> Ni solus, vod'ika - You're not alone, little brother.  
> Vi ti gar ratiin- we're with you always  
> Ca'jate - goodnight  
> Jahaala nuhoy - sleep well

**Author's Note:**

> Please comment if you would like! I'd love to read your thoughts.


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